Quack, quack, quack!

After months of trying to perfect it, I can finally say I have it down pat. That's right, folks. I can officially do the pregnancy waddle.

I didn't know if I'd ever master the wobbling walk. Not that my belly isn't big enough to warrant it. I just didn't see how, when or why I'd have a chance to work on it. Now...I fully understand. Going into my 32nd week of pregnancy, I know exactly why pregnant women waddle.

I personally don't know that it has as much to do with the weight gain as it does the pressure that is put directly onto one's lower half - bladder, bowels, the whole enchilada. I thought I had the urge to tinkle frequently at 20 weeks, but now I know those weren't real urges. Those were merely inclinations.

I'm not only a waddler, I'm an ambling waddler. I take my own sweet time getting anywhere and everywhere. It's just impossible to walk quickly - and you're looking at the Greencastle Middle School 8th grade speed walking champion here. (Eat my dust, Misty Gibson!)

Johnny remarked recently that I haven't walked this slowly since my days as a true Lupite. Man, I used to walk slowly when I was sick. Back then, my ambling ways were caused by fatigue, aching and stiff joints, lack of energy, and an all-over fluishness that left me practically unable to put one foot in front of the other.

Come to think of it, I'll take my prego waddle over that any day of the week. Plus, I only have 6 1/2 weeks to go. These finite, these-too-shall-pass kinds of scenarios are great - such a change from the never-ending Lupus ordeals of yesteryear. Who knew pregnancy could be such a refreshing experience? (I'm joking, I'm joking.)


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