Cue the color bars...I think this is a test.
I've decided that I may have encountered the greatest challenge of my lupus career yet...writing and promoting a book while suffering from what's been called the "euphoria of accomplishment" and being a "highly action-prone individual" who fancies herself as an overachiever, all while sporting a chronic illness. You think that I might be struggling a bit with my high expectations, desire to accomplish, and my eagerness to check off items on my to-do list? You bet I am!
So I've had to go back and re-read chapter 3 of my book. Really - I did. I find that, under a bit of stress and in the face of a laundry list of things to accomplish, I revert back to my old standbys of determination, productivity, and a desire for perfection. So where does my daily nap fit in with all that? Exactly. That's a good question.
Truth is, I've been able to take my nap - because a month or two ago, I was skimping on my rest and it was beginning to take its toll. Now that I have that under control, I realize that I still have to fight the need to succeed. It's understandable that I want to take every opportunity to get the word out about living well with lupus - but you know what? I just can't do it. Running myself ragged, trying to make sure that all of my signings are properly promoted, my website is up to date, and that word spreads about my book is, well...it's work. And didn't I retire a few years ago? Yup, I did. And for good reason. Since I've stopped working, my health has never been so good, and I've never felt so great. Enough said.
While speaking about my book to promote the idea of living well isn't "work", I need to make sure that the effort that goes into it doesn't resemble "work" either. So it's back to boundary-making and stress-eliminating I go. I can still let people know my book is out there. I can still be a success in my own eyes - I just have to make sure, first and foremost - that the balance that I've worked so hard to establish doesn't get thrown off by my new endeavor.
And that's why my book ends the way it does. Don't know what I'm talking about? Grab a copy and find out!
Quotes above courtesy of Fred Friedberg's "Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: Seven Proven Steps to Less Pain and More Energy."